looking back

i hung out with an old friend this weekend. we sat on the balcony of murphy's pub 2nd street and drank beers while we chatted about this and that. she said something she used to say when we were roommates all those years ago, and without thinking, i responded accordingly. 

it's not that the comment was profound, it's not that it was hilarious or brought back memories. it just reminded both of us that we've known each other for a long time. seventeen years. she's the person who's known me the longest without ever having met my mother. 

it's still strange that i think in these terms, but i do. it no longer makes me sad the way it used to. it no longer makes me crazy the way it used to. but it's still part of who i am. we all have a past. we all have something about us that nearly no one else knows about us. we all have something about us that someone almost knows about us. 

this weekend has been great. great for remembering. remembering that friendship. remembering that time. remembering that growth. remembering that life. things are different now, as they always continue to be. and how would we know if we didn't have something, someone to help us look back?